While it may seem that some people are born only with self-confidence, trust is largely an acquired skill. It is something you can model and teach other people, especially children. This is important for parents, teachers and coaches as they guide children to adulthood. Start by building up their self-esteem, independent thought and positive self-talk. Show them how to set up and achieve goals and how to deal with failure when it happens. With lessons like these, you can teach the people around you to become more confident.
[ Edit ] Step
[ Edit ] Building self-esteem
- Model behavior for people. If you try to improve someone's confidence, you can be a model for how to act safely. Act safely around them and in all your interpersonal interactions. If the person sees that you are living the lessons you are trying to learn, they are more likely to try them in their own lives. 
- Show them self-confident interpersonal relationships such as eye contact, handshake and small talk. This allows them to practice in a safe environment.
- If you make a mistake or fail at something, let it roll off your back. Show the people around you that failure is good and that you can continue.
- Praise small achievements for raising a person's self-esteem. If you are trying to build someone's confidence, start small. Every achievement they complete is a reason for the celebration, even if it seems small. Be happy for your friends, children or students. Over time, your positive energy will teach them to celebrate their own achievements. 
- For example, if your daughter only hits a single during a softball game, congratulate her as much as she met a home game. It is still an achievement worthy of praise and gradually her confidence will improve.
- This works for school settings. If your student feels down about getting a B test, remind them that they got a C + on the last test. This means that they are improving and are on the right track.
- Remember to keep your praise genuine. Do not lie or exaggerate, or the person may see that you are not serious.
- Give specific compliments so people know what they did well. A specific compliment is better than a simple "You did well." Instead, tell them exactly what they did well so they know where they are strong. This makes your compliments more genuine and increases the person's self-esteem more by showing them their strengths. 
- If you are satisfied with the student's paper, for example, do not just say that the report is good. Tell them it is very accurate and well written.
- You can still compliment someone if they also failed. For example, if your son didn't have the best football game, you could say "I'm proud that you went on and didn't give up." This turns a negative situation into something positive and teaches a lesson about always making a good effort.
- Start with a positive statement before correcting anything. At some point you may need to point out where someone needs to improve. This is especially important if you are a parent, teacher or coach. If you need to make criticism or correction, always start by saying something positive first. This arouses the person's mood and makes it easier for them to take the critical feedback that comes up. 
- If you are correcting a student's research document that needs a lot of work, try to find something to compliment first. Start by saying, "You did a good job of finding many different sources to use." Then turn: "This paper would be much better if you improved the writing and developed a clearer argument."
- Always point out if the person has improved. If a boy you train used to beat 0-4 in baseball games but now beats 1-4, say: "It's good that you're improving! Let's do a little more work on your swing to make it even better."
- Offer constructive feedback and suggestions instead of just criticism.When you have to criticize someone, always be ready to follow this up with suggested actions.The person will feel that you are really trying to help. to criticize their own work and fix problems on their own. 
- Try to prepare your criticism by saying, "You may not want he is these criteria, but remember that I am trying to help. We can talk about how to solve the problems later. "
- If you don't know what feedback you can offer, try reversing the script and asking," What do you think you can do to improve? "This shows that you are interested in guiding the person even if you do not have all the answers.
- Countering negative self-talk. Negative self-talk is when a person talks about themselves poorly and focuses on their weaknesses. you see your friend, child or teammate talking about themselves so stop them. Tell them they are getting worse rather than fix the problem. Encourage them to look at the positive side of situations and see the glass half full. 
- You may need to point out someone's strengths to help them see the bright side, if your friend is angry about knocking out, remind them that they got three hits in the last game.
- Example on negative self talk is: "I will never be good at this," "I'm just stupid," or "Everyone is better than me." These are destructive attitudes that make a person feel inferior without offering anything positive
- Ko Remember that there is a difference between negative talk and realistic conversation. For example, if your friend never studies and is hard on himself to get bad grades, say "You're right, you're lazy at school. But you can fix it. Let's work on that." This offers constructive solutions without engage in negative talk.
[ Edit ] Guide people to achieve goals
- Set achievable goals for them. Having ambitious goals is good, but setting extremely high goals does not work well to build someone's confidence. This gives them disappointment when they do not meet the high goal. Instead, design a manageable goal that you know the person can reach with some extra effort. Small victories like these will build a person's confidence over time. 
- For example, if you are a teacher it is unrealistic to try to make a student with a D average get 99% on the next test. A much more realistic goal is 80%. This is high enough for the student to function, but low enough for it to be achieved with normal effort.
- After a few small successes, you can start to encourage the person to tackle more difficult goals. After a few small victories, their confidence will be high enough to handle the extra pressure.
- Make sure that goals depend on the person himself and not others. Don't say, "I want you to be the best in the team." That's because someone else is no better. Instead, say, "I want you to get a .300 stroke average." This is based on the individual's individual effort.
- Take a step back and let others make decisions. People cannot build trust if you always make decisions for them. Encourage them to think independently and come to their own conclusions. This helps them to develop and trust their own problem-solving abilities without the need for help. 
- This can start easily. If you help your son with his homework, do not solve the problem for him. Ask what he thinks the answer is. Then, if he doesn't know, go through the process to get the answer.
- You can do this as a teacher as well. Guide the class to the correct answer rather than just tell them. If a student asks a question, rather than answering directly, ask the class if anyone can answer it.
- For younger children, you can start teaching independence with small tasks like letting them choose their clothes for the day.
- Make suggestions rather than take over. Even safe people sometimes need help, and you can still offer help while building their trust. The trick is to not do all the work yourself. Observe and offer suggestions based on the person's needs. Leave it up to them whether they take the advice you offer or not. In this way, they work mostly independently and build their own trust. 
- If your daughter asks for help with a scientific project, don't build her whole thing for her. Work with her and let her do most of the work. If she needs help, intervene to push her in the right direction.
- Don't be angry if someone doesn't take your suggestions. Remember to let them make the decisions themselves.
- Let people make small mistakes without correcting them. If you never let your children, students, friends or teammates move every now and then, it has a negative impact on their confidence. People who are not allowed to make mistakes have difficulty coping with rejection and failure, which are normal parts of life. Don't make decisions for people all the time to save them from failure. Let them make their own decisions and if they fail, explain to them why they move and what they can do better next time. 
- If your daughter always leaves her homework around the house and expects you to pack it for her, stop doing it. If she forgets to bring her homework and gets into trouble, tell her that's what happens when she's disorganized.
- Of course, this does not apply to serious or dangerous mistakes. If you suspect that someone will do something that is very negative for their lives, do not hesitate to let them know that it is a bad idea.
- Show the person that perfection is not the goal. Striving for perfection is an unrealistic goal because people are not perfect. Telling the person you are working with to try to be perfect will only make them stressed and worried if they can't reach that level. Instead, encourage them to be good enough to satisfy themselves. This builds trust in a much more productive way than demanding perfection. 
- Try to avoid using the word perfectly. This can give someone the wrong idea and think you say they are perfect.
- If someone has a hard time accepting that they can't be perfect, try showing them some videos of professional musicians, sports stars, or athletes who make mistakes. Tell them that these people are still moving after working for years and are still not perfect, so they should not expect to be.
- Encourage the person to step outside their comfort zone. Living in your comfort zone does not create confidence. People need to do things that they are not used to building their trust. Encourage the person to try new hobbies, go to new places, try new food, listen to new music and overlook their everyday lives. As the person becomes more comfortable trying new things, their confidence in dealing with different situations will increase. 
- If your friend has confidence problems, try to encourage them to join you in the gym or do another hobby they are not used to. It may take some endurance, but trying out new activities gradually gets people out of their comfort zones.
- An easy way to get out of your comfort zone is to make a commitment to order something new every time you go to a restaurant. This is low risk, gets you to try new things and introduces you potentially good food.
[ Edit ] References
- ↑ https: // parent child. net.au/pre-teens/development/social-emotional-development/confidence-in-teens Chapter19659063vard ↑ https://www.teachhub.com/teaching-strategies-help-build-self-confidence [1945 https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/peaceful-parents-happy-kids/201506/12-ways-raise-competent-confident-child-grit
- ↑ https: //www.teachhub.com/teaching-strategies-help-build-self-confidence Chapter19659066vard ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/peaceful-parents-happy-kids/201506/12- roads-raising-competent-safe-child-gravel
- ↑ https://www.parents.com/toddlers-preschoolers/development/fear/secrets-of-confident-kids/  ↑ https://www.teachhub.com/teaching-strategies-help-build-self-confidence
- [1945 https://www.psych ologytoday.com/us/blog/peaceful-parents-happy- kids / 201506/12-ways-raise-competent-confident-child-gritebrit19659070 Yan ↑ https: //www.psychologytoday.c about / us / blog / peaceful-parents-happy-children / 201506/12-ways-raise-competent-confident-child-gravel
- [1945 https://www.parents.com/toddlers-preschoolers/ development / fear / secrets-of-safe-child /
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/peaceful-parents-happy-kids/201506/12-ways-raise-competent -confident-child -grit
- ↑ https://www.inc.com/minda-zetlin/13-easy-ways-to-boost-your-confidence.html